love languages

In candlelight and a camera flash,
it was clear that I missed him.

In this place, after all this time,
nothing had changed.

In our smiles,
gritted through teeth

and gaping unsaid words,
our lies of okayness lay bare.

There’s different types of love:
tender love
fast love
deep, wild, passionate, kiss me till
the sun rises love.
But my favorite kind

-he paused,
his eyes snapping up

to look me
dead in the face-

Is forbidden love.
This one right here.
When you know you can’t have it forever
so you hold on to the moments you have
before they slip like stars into the sunrise,
even though they coat your throat with
burning bittersweet desire.

Laughter glittered around us,
the air yellow and sunny,

yet a
sadness dripped into his words,

lacing his whisper with
a sudden sobriety:

It’s a drug.
Being around you, I know
it’s no good for me, yet
I’ll take any piece of you
Just to taste it again,
The honey in your soul.

You’re a drug.
Knowing I can’t have you,
nothing fills the cavern in my chest
you left when you tore yourself
out of it, bleeding and beautiful.
It’s a war of attrition:
I’ll take down
anything, anyone,
with me to fight this war
between my heart
and my head.

I only stared at his honesty,
the bruised and pulsing truth

he served with his confession.
How silly,

that we loved so hard
we grew to hate it.

How fucking naive
to think that we would make it out alive.

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